Who They Say I Am

Tomorrow marks the first day of October.

It’s a new month, a new season, the perfect time for a fresh start.

That being said, I thought it was the perfect time to reintroduce myself to, well, myself.

Get a little “Hello my name is _____” sticker action.

To do so I thought I would consult today’s best gage of personal identity: Buzzfeed Quizzes and this is what I came up with.
Hello my name is Kim but you can call me Archibald

As in my Gossip Girl spirit animal, Nate

I’m kind, caring, and trustworthy, and going places don’t you worry

Not to mention I’m a total freaking babe.

I’m also known for my swearing, they actually call me the king

Just ask my beloved sitcom soul mate, the illustrious Chandler Bing

Humor, nubbins and awkwardness are sure to fill our days together

I’ll pursue a career in ballet and he’ll forecast the weather

We’ll meet long after my love affair with Gambit of the X-Men

Who will have swept me off my feet then left me crying in the street

Longing for his fuchsia chest plate romancin’

Now that accent you detect isn’t quite what you’d expect

Not the Californian one you thought you’d heard

They say my speech is up to par

With those long drunk in a New England Bar

Chanting “SOX” and trading H’s for my R’s

Like I said my name is Kim but you can call me Gellar

As in Ross, the Friends character I most embody

I have a big heart, bigger brain, and sometimes appear insane

When I perform the big routine at your New Year’s Party

You’ll want me around though, remember me

When the world is overrun by zombies

I’m fearless and fierce, have been called a grammar whiz

And am as adorable as a pack of baby donkeys.

True love, for me, is right around the corner, his type a famous movie star

Though they say I attract musicians, my spirit leaving their chorus wishin’

My Olsen trivia knowledge taking them places deep, wide, shallow, close and far.

And though I have a few minor faults

I’m an adequate adult

Since my secret middle name is Amadeus

I’m more of a cat than a dog

Am 50% apple snob

And will one day contract telekinesis.

Nice to meet you.